Reflections on trials...

I've been thinking a lot about trials in the last couple of months--probably because a lot of people I know are going through some pretty big ones--cancer, debilitating accidents, death of loved ones, heartbreaking divorce, the list goes on. Yesterday in Relief Society the teacher asked us to share some of our most significant life's lessons. I was distracted with Talita at the time so I didn't have the presence of mind to gather my thoughts and share them before the lesson moved on. Whether or not anyone reads this, I feel the need to write down what I consider to be my most significant life lesson because it came about while going through the worst trial of my life.

I won't explain the trial here--those of you who know our family well already know what happened after our son, Tyler, passed away in 2002. It was the most devastating thing I have ever lived through. I wanted the situation to go away and asked Scott for a blessing hoping for that reassurance. However, what the Lord told me was that I was experiencing this trial so I could learn and grow and become more like our Father in Heaven. The wording in that blessing was similar to D&C 121:7-8 and 122:7. I will be forever grateful for Joseph Smith and his experience in Liberty Jail.

Seven months later, the promised resolution took place and the lesson was written deep into my heart that I was allowed to go through that experience so that I could draw closer to my Father in Heaven and my Savior, and have just a little more understanding of what Jesus Christ endured for all of mankind. I knew that They suffered with me--every sorrow, pain, and heartache I felt, They felt too. And they allowed me to suffer because They knew it would help me be a better person, and more worthy to live with them eternally. I felt honored to have experienced that trial because I knew I was loved with a love so huge that it caused a wise Father to allow his dear child to suffer greatly (and He along with her) in order that she have the opportunity and privilege of returning home to live worthily with Him.

This is not to say I think I have it made--far from it. Life's definitely not over, and I have much more to learn, but I hope I can always remember these precious truths learned through the "furnace of my afflictions."